As iconic and beloved as the Pokémon franchise is, it also attracts more than its share of derision. From questionable creature designs to the series’ refusal to stray from a safe and familiar formula, it’s clear that Pokémon isn’t infallible. When logic is brought into the equation, things get more than a little muddled too.
Game Freak established a lot of the conventions of the Pokémon world and the critters’ place within it during Generation I, and they’ve remained largely unchanged since. With a little scrutiny, though, it becomes apparent that the ways that people interact with Pokémon are just plain strange. Here are just some examples that fans often sweep under the rug.
10 Abandoning Them In The Box
Every Pokémon fan is familiar with this concept. When you catch a creature you don’t have room for in your party, what happens to it? it heads straight on over to your boxes, that’s what. If it’s not a Pokémon you were intending to use, you might look it over quickly, or you might never even look at its stats page.
The logic of Pokémon storage is a question that we try not to swell on. Where are these Pokémon, exactly? Are they in some kind of grim digital purgatory, with Cerberus on guard to make sure nobody heads over the river Styx that isn’t supposed to? Maybe we’re thinking too deeply about this, but it’s just not cool to leave Pokémon behind like this.
9 Cross-Species Breeding
In the Pokémon community, many snarky jokes and memes are made at Ditto’s expense. The poor little gelatinous blob is simply a tool for Pokémon breeders, being super handy for the purpose as it’s compatible with just about everything and can also pass on its nature and such.
Let’s just explore that whole ‘compatible with everything’ idea for a second, though. All this inter-species egg-making should result in some real genetic horrors, shouldn’t it? We’ve all seen the fan-made Pokémon mashups. On top of that, what about pairings like Skitty and Wailord? It’s a thorny issue all around, one that’s conveniently skated over in the interest of making gameplay more practical.
8 Relentless Breeding For ‘Perfect’ Pokémon
On the subject of practical gameplay, perfect Pokémon are an essential concern for competitive players. After all, you don’t want to go into a match at a disadvantage, do you? Every EV and IV point counts.
To that end, breeding can be a very time-consuming affair. If you’ve even dabbled in the competitive battling scene, you’ve probably got boxes full of ‘breedjects;’ Pokémon you’ll never use because they have the wrong ability, only a 30 IV in a particular stat instead of a 31 or so on. For creatures who are supposed to be loyal companions, the idea of perfect-or-worthless just seems completely anti- Pokémon.
7 Trusting Them As The Guardians Of Children
Granted, we might be taking this one a little too literally here, but let’s just examine the beginning of a Pokémon game. You’ve got your Pokédex, you’ve got your starter Pokémon, you’re off on a journey around the region with nothing but a chattering rival (or several) for company.
Well, rival and your starter, that is. Generally, the protagonist’s mom will comment on the fact that you’ll be safe now, with this tiny level 5 fire-breathing lizard you’ve known for eight seconds by your side. Maybe we’re being cynical, but there seems to be something just a little off about this whole setup.
6 Putting Gigantic Pokémon Deities Into Teeny Poké Balls
Do you remember that business at the end of Aladdin, where our hero tricks Jafar into wishing to become a mighty genie himself so that Aladdin can trap him in a lamp? “Phenomenal cosmic power, itty-bitty living space.” When it comes to Legendary Pokémon, it’s a similar situation.
Now, it’s not easy to capture a Legendary Pokémon. We’ve all watched, exasperated, as one breaks out of the 89th Poké Ball. The fact that we can do so, however, is strange enough in and of itself. Powerhouses like Groudon and Kyogre, submitting to that? Never. Don’t get us started on Arceus either. The almighty deity of the Pokéverse, casually hopping into a Ball? Even if that were feasible, imagine the dangers of actually having this thing in your party or PC.
5 Keeping Super Dangerous Ones In Their Homes
Another popular target of snarky Pokémon jokes is the Pokédex itself. Some of these entries, as we know, are just patently absurd. Magcargo’s body temperature is 18,000 degrees F? Sure it is. Machamp can move a mountain with just one arm? Oh, of course. We just bet it can.
If we are to go ahead and accept that these are video games and the normal rules of logic needn’t apply, though, we just can’t get away from the fact that people in the Pokémon world work alongside these creatures, or even keep them in their homes as pets. Now, all pet owners know that their little bundles of furry joy have ‘accidents’ every now and then, but a Magcargo’s accidents could probably vaporise a whole neighborhood.
4 Artificially Create Brand New Ones
If the Jurassic Park movies taught us anything, it’s that Jeff Goldblum is so darn cool he can make a mathematician look like a darn rock star. If they taught us anything else, though, it’s that creating life is an astonishingly, stupendously dangerous thing to get too deep into.
Sadly, the scientists of the Pokémon world were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should. The catastrophic consequences of Mewtwo’s creation speak for themselves, but humankind also artificially developed all manner of species, from Porygon to Genesect. In the series’ universe, this isn’t questioned nearly as much as it should be.
3 Using Dynamax And Gigantamax Forms In Battle
With each new Pokémon generation, of course, comes an interesting new gimmick that may or may not be a good idea. For Pokémon Sword & Shield, that gimmick was Dynamax/Gigantamax. It’s a heck of a spectacle (a Pikachu suddenly becoming the size of the Chrysler Building is a mildly surprising event to say the least), but… how? Just how?
While the story does go some distance towards explaining the process, we’ve got to question whether this would be something even remotely exploitable. What kind of effect does Dynamaxing have on the Pokémon concerned, from a biological standpoint? How about Gigantamaxing, in which they briefly adopt an entirely different form entirely?
2 Grinding In Battles Against Wild Pokémon
As a rule of thumb, fellow trainers are far more rewarding to grind against than wild Pokémon. If you’ve fought everybody on a certain route and you just need a quick level or two, however, wild critters can be valuable too. We never stop and think about the impact we’re having when we do this, though, do we?
This being a super family friendly franchise, Pokémon merely return to their Poké Balls when they faint, or simply faint in the wild. What happens to this after that, though? Is the grass of Route 1 littered with snoring Pidgey and Rattata? The world may never know.
1 NPCs And Their Seemingly Random Trades
To a certain extent, there is some logic to this one. Sometimes. We’re here to catch ‘em all and we can’t do that without any trading. Some of the NPCs are supposedly competent trainers themselves, so it makes perfect sense that they’d be seeking some trades themselves.
Sometimes, however, there’s just no reason why they’d want to make such a trade. The famous Mr. Mime named Marcel from outside Diglett’s Cave in Gen I, for instance, is on offer for a lowly Abra. Mr. Mime isn’t actually obtainable in any other way, so why would this guy ever want to do that? Other than the game wanting to give you a way to nab this Pokémon, there’s no reason. A lot of in-game trades are either very lop-sided or mostly pointless, being especially redundant now that we don’t have to mess with link Cables and the like to trade with other players.
NEXT: Every Available Pokémon Trade In Blue/Red (& Where To Find Them)
